One of Those Days

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Having one of those days/nights.  I’ve just been wanting some quiet me time and it’s far from what I’ve gotten.  Well, guess I am being selfish…I did go to the city and do some running this afternoon, but that’s just not the same.  Guess I’m just in one of my moods.  

Made the dog and the cat get off me a little while ago and neither were happy with me, especially the dog, he likes to stay attached to the hip, especially when I’ve been gone for any period of time.  I love him to pieces, but he can smother.  I’d come down to my dungeon earlier because I felt like writing, but you know it’s hard to do when you have bodies on you!  I can see him at the moment, watching me from his pile of dog pillows, blankets and toys, he’s so neglected.  

I’ve actually been doing a lot of thinking lately.  The weather is finally turning for the better, at least for the time being…my husband is complaining about the mud but I’m keeping to my earlier promise to not complain about the slop if it would just warm up a bit.  

Anyway, I tend to get off track…I’ve been thinking of the things to start doing in order to better myself, for myself.  You know that thing it’s hard to do when you are a mom.  

I have started drinking a big glass of orange juice a day (when my husband reminds me), I’ve read it’s good for high cholesterol.  That’s an easy enough habit to get into even when I don’t like the stuff.  

I’m thinking I NEED to get back into going to church.  Bubba and I have been going on Wednesday evenings for Lent, and it’s done what I’ve hoped it would do, make me feel like I can get my hind end out of bed on Sunday mornings and get back to church.  I miss it.  I always feel so good when I’ve gone, but I am the worse morning person in the world.  If service could just be at 10:30 instead of 9:30 it would be so much easier…as I’m looking at the clock and it’s almost 1 a.m. already.  

I’ve always had a night owl issue, it has to run in the DNA because it goes back to my dad and his mom and my kids are the same way, my husband can go to bed at 7 and sleep until morning.  Don’t know how he does it, I can’t sleep for more than 3, 4 hours tops without waking up, think it comes from being mom, always getting up to check on the kids during the night and dogs who decide to bark because the wind changed direction.  

Anyway, off track again…I know I need to work on changing my routine, but saying and planning and doing are of course two totally different things.  For 20 years I’ve waited all day, until after everyone is in bed to have my time. That’s when I watch my political shows, watch the news, crochet and smoke, I have my body trained and I’ve been having a hell of a time making myself make the changes.  I’m down to one child at home and he’s in school all day, I can take my time during breaks during the usual taking care of things routine, but I feel guilty taking my time during the day, even when no one is home.  I know, it doesn’t make much sense.

Just making myself go to bed 30 minutes early seems like I’m cutting off my own toes, it shouldn’t be that hard to start at 30 minutes and work up from there.  

There is no reason I can’t start making these changes, I have to get off my ass and make myself make these changes. I just have to keep reminding myself that it takes 20 days or something like that, to make a new change a habit, or however the saying goes.  

Well hell…I suppose, tomorrow day should be a busy one.  Have the alarm set already to get up for church, we’ll see if I get my butt moving or not.  

In the afternoon there’s going to be a very sad birthday party for our family.  My cousin who died a little over a month ago, both his and his little boy’s birthday is tomorrow.  Going to have a party for the little guy and then a balloon send off for Chad for his first heavenly birthday, guessing it’s going to be a tear jerker.  Going to be really tough on Aiden over the years, it was always so special that he was born on his daddy’s birthday, and he is such a big daddy’s boy.

There is also team sorting tomorrow and I’m sure Bubba won’t want to be going to any birthday party, he and Kaet’s boyfriend have their Sunday routine.  He’s really going to howl if I actually get my butt moving for church and get him up to go.  He likes church, but like his mother, doesn’t like to get up early on the weekend and then get cleaned up on top of it…he’s 13, so having to dress in decent clothes AND tuck his shirt in just about does him in.  

It really would have been great if we’d been able to go to Oklahoma this weekend like we’d wanted to do.  Too much going on for the Old Boy to get away, maybe next year we’ll make it to the timed events at The Lazy E, it’s been a few years since we’ve been able to go.  

Okay, that’s it…I have to make myself shake it…take care!

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