Doesn’t Look Like Spring


Saturday 17. December 2016

Starting to look a lot like Christmas!  We have snow!  Not much, but enough that very little grass is showing.  We were lucky and didn’t get nailed overnight last night like was forcast.  

We do have massive cold here.  Supposed to hit 20 below overnight, not windshield factor.  The record is 19 below for tomorrow.  We are in the running to beat it.  Thankfully we’re supposed to get into the lower 20’s on Monday and the weatherman is talking 30’s most of the week, so there is hope!  We’ve had way too damned cold for a few days now. 

Kirk and Leo spent most of the afternoon with the horses in the shed, getting them set up as warm as possible.  We have five horses and four inside stalls, so they built a make shift one in the shed, went to town to get rubber mats being the only areas in the shed without cement are in the four stalls.  We hit maybe four degrees today, so Chili needed to be able to get inside as well.

The emotional part of the holidays has kicked in.  Last night I was doing some baking, Kirk came into the kitchen and asked just why I was baking so much.  The tears started in and that led me to sitting on my bathroom floor, bawling. Didn’t help that I was listening to Christmas music and missing the childhood Christmas’ with my cousins and aunts and uncles and my grandparents. 

I’m not adjusting to this change very well.  When Kaet was in junior high and in high school we always had kids in and out of the house.  Our house was one of the landing zones for Kaet and her friends and I loved it.  They wanted my cookies and treats, they wanted to sit and visit with me.  There were a few of the girls, Kaet included that would ask me to curl and do their hair for the Christmas programs.  I’m missing those days.

These days it’s quiet.  Bubba does his thing, Kirk does his thing.  They don’t get into the Christmas thing so much.  I can get Leo to help a little with the baking, a little.  

Doing much better today.  Was able to get quite a bit of my baking done.  Don’t know who I’ll be taking treats to.  Way back in the day (actually only a handful of years ago) we had some older folks I’d take treats to and would buy extra FFA fruit to take fruit baskets to this time of year.  Everyone is gone.  Ms. Margaret, Uncle Jamie, Gramma Max, Old Ma, they’ve all passed away.  Kirk’s folks, they’ve moved to Florida.  

I get it, times change…looks like I need to figure out where I belong in all this change.  Figure out the start to the new chapter.  Sucks!  I’ve never been good with change, I would love it if things stayed the same forever.  

Deep down, I know change is good and all will be good in the end, it’s just like poking around in the dark trying to find the light switch, once the switch is found all will be good!