Great Grandma


I walk into the antique store and that glorious smell hits me.

I smile and happy tears dare to fall.

Remembrance of a time decades past

with a wish to go back in time for a moment or two.

“Come see Grandma”.

I run and hide behind my mom.

“Stop now and go”.

I’m afraid.

“Steven, get her and bring her to me”.

I hold onto my mom’s legs.

I’ve been here before.

I know her, remember her.

She says she’s my grandma, it doesn’t click.

The grandma is always sitting in her chair.

Her chair is in the kitchen.

I never see her out of that chair.

There is no tv.

There is an interesting set of kitchen table and chairs.

She has hair as white as snow.

Her hair appears short but I’m told in later years it was long, always put back.

There is always a blanket in progress on her lap.

She has long, skinny fingers.

They scare a little girl.

Many years later I see her again.

She isn’t in the house,

but in an old persons home.

She’s sitting in that chair.

A blanket in progress on her lap.

Her long, skinny fingers folded in her lap.

She says very little.

I now understand she’s my mom’s grandma too.


I’m in my bedroom.

Mom walks into the hallway and says,

“Grandma has passed away”.

I cry and cry and cry although I didn’t really know her.

We walk into a small church and there she is,

in the front of the church, 

in a box.

I’m afraid but my brother says,

“You have to go see her”.

I hide behind my brother and peak at the grandma with the snow white hair,

her long, skinny fingers are linked together.

I cry and cry and cry.

I walk into the antique stop and that most wondrous old smell hits me,

brings tears to my eyes and a smile to my face.

I think of the wooden and wicker little kid rocking chair

she handed down to me as a little girl.

I think of the beautiful kitchen table that was handed down to her,

from her mother,

that now stands in my own kitchen.

I think of the white haired lady with her long hair pulled back,

sitting in her kitchen.

She tells me she’s my grandma.

I wish I would have been able to know her more.





A few years ago when Kirk’s Gramma Max passed away Pastor Katie gave the family these tokens.


Kirk, Kaet and I keep ours on our key chains, Leo’s is in my jewelry box.  Never does a time pass when I look at this token that I don’t think of Gramma.  When Kirk’s Uncle Jamie passed in May, Pastor Katie gave them out to the family again, although different than the one above, that one I have on the rosary I keep in my car, Leo put his on his key chain, Kirk’s in on his dresser and don’t know what Kaet did with her’s.  Again, when I see it I think of Uncle Jamie.  

My Uncle Gene passed away the end of July.  Didn’t hit me until a few weeks ago that these tokens really do have a meaning to us, a way to keep our loved ones in our lives.  They are just that little something special and I just knew I needed to find something similar for my uncle.


Was so tickled when I was able to find that little something.  I bought a dozen, gave one to my mom and sent ones to the other two sisters, Uncle Gene’s wife and children and my brother and sister and to my kids.  

wp-1474947599325.jpg  Heard from my cousin Sara this evening.  Today was her birthday, her first ever without her dad and she was touched to get this in the mail today.  

It’s such a simple little thing, nothing special on it’s own.  There’s just something about this little piece of pewter that you can look at and know it’s in memory of someone so loved and each time you look at it you can’t help but think of that person and smile.  

So thankful to Gramma’s Pastor Katie for giving the first and second of these little trinkets, something I never would have thought of and means so much.  

Peace To All!